How to Overcome Hard Times
Reach out to someone who cares about you
This can be a parent, a spouse or boyfriend, a family member, or a friend. I know this is sometimes the hardest thing to do. I feel like I always have a brave face on and I don’t want to bother my loved ones with my issues, but if you are feeling sad, alone, stressed, or angry. Reach out and seek support. They can provide you with love and support and maybe even advice and understanding. So often we think that things in our lives only happen to us and forget that others might have weathered similar storms.
Write it down
Sometimes just the act of putting our thoughts and fears down on paper makes them seem less scary. You can walk through the thoughts and feelings you can even find a solution in breaking down the problem.
Break it down
Often times my darkest fears aren’t based on my actual situation but a worst case scenario of what could happen in a problem gets out of hand. For example, I’m worried that my 19-month-old is not verbal. In and of itself, it isn’t an insurmountable problem and while he is below average, his situation isn’t unique. The problem is I am thinking about what happens if he never develops the ability to communicate effectively and struggles with employment in the future because people will judge him. See how out of hand and unlikely that is. The more likely future will be that he is only slightly delayed and he will catch up in time or he will have to spend some time in speech therapy. Neither is a situation I can predict. Keeping the problem in the present reality is important.
Look for solutions
Whether the problem is you are unhappy with your job (like my husband), that you are not bringing in an adequate income (also a struggle we are currently battling) or you have a child that isn’t meeting milestones that you are concerned about, you should always spend more time focused on solutions as opposed to focusing on the problem. My husband is currently looking for other employment possibilities. I am currently taking on jobs that allow me to stay home with my son and make a small income during the time he is sleeping and I have made our pediatrician aware of the concerns I have about my son. Even if the solution is a compromise, such as me having to cut back on my blog and household duties in order to help financially, it is still a step in the right direction.
Sometimes just finding a way to focus on positive things can give you a new perspective. If you feel that you are overwhelmed and obsessed with an issue, try to step away and focus on the good in your life. Normally I make a point to spend extra time with my parents or friends and try to spend time on fun, sometimes trivial things that bring me joy. Then when I have a quiet minute, I can reevaluate the problem and often it doesn’t seem to have the same weight.
Get professional help
If you are struggling with a situation that truly is too big to handle, your best option is to get professional help. Whether that is a financial planner, a spiritual advisor, a career counselor, a mental health professional or your personal doctor. Some things require a special solution. Asking for help is often the strongest decision you can make.